Beethoven and the Beetles
Just passing on another whimsical news item. If anyone gets fed up, tell me to stop.
DEAR MISS MANNERS: Is there a polite way to disinfest a stranger?
I was enjoying a piano recital recently in a pavilion open to the outdoors. During the second movement of a Beethoven sonata, I could not help noticing that the enjoyment of the lady sitting in front of me was about to be curtailed by a large beetle. This insect was rapidly crawling up her dress and would in moments reach the top and almost certainly fall down her back.
Summoning the most feathery touch I could muster, I managed to flick the thing away without disturbing the woman. My friends teased me afterward about my "surgeon's hands." But I wonder: Would there have been a better plan of action from an etiquette standpoint in this situation? Alert the lady before possibly touching her? Secure her permission before proceeding? And what of the time element?
Gentle Reader: And what about Beethoven?
If not for him, you could have said, "Excuse me, there's a bug on you" and flicked it away, all so quickly that the lady would understand her plight at the same time that you were performing the rescue. Or you could have merely informed the lady of its presence and let her deal with it herself.
But there was Beethoven. Being deaf, he might not have been bothered by your talking, but all those other people trying to listen to him would have been furious.
The general rule is that you never touch a stranger without permission. (It also usually applies to acquaintances, but if Miss Manners declared that a firm rule, the human race would come to an end.)
----------------------------------------------
Miss Manners appears Sundays, Mondays and Fridays. E-mail her at MissManners@unitedmedia.com.
End of news item
********************************************
Actually, something similar happened to me at a concert. A wasp was crawling up somebody in front of me and I didn't know whether to ignore it or swat it but, fortunately, if flew off. And, before you ask, the music playing was not Vaughan Williams.
Michael
[This message has been edited by Michael (edited 08-13-2006).]
DEAR MISS MANNERS: Is there a polite way to disinfest a stranger?
I was enjoying a piano recital recently in a pavilion open to the outdoors. During the second movement of a Beethoven sonata, I could not help noticing that the enjoyment of the lady sitting in front of me was about to be curtailed by a large beetle. This insect was rapidly crawling up her dress and would in moments reach the top and almost certainly fall down her back.
Summoning the most feathery touch I could muster, I managed to flick the thing away without disturbing the woman. My friends teased me afterward about my "surgeon's hands." But I wonder: Would there have been a better plan of action from an etiquette standpoint in this situation? Alert the lady before possibly touching her? Secure her permission before proceeding? And what of the time element?
Gentle Reader: And what about Beethoven?
If not for him, you could have said, "Excuse me, there's a bug on you" and flicked it away, all so quickly that the lady would understand her plight at the same time that you were performing the rescue. Or you could have merely informed the lady of its presence and let her deal with it herself.
But there was Beethoven. Being deaf, he might not have been bothered by your talking, but all those other people trying to listen to him would have been furious.
The general rule is that you never touch a stranger without permission. (It also usually applies to acquaintances, but if Miss Manners declared that a firm rule, the human race would come to an end.)
----------------------------------------------
Miss Manners appears Sundays, Mondays and Fridays. E-mail her at MissManners@unitedmedia.com.
End of news item
********************************************
Actually, something similar happened to me at a concert. A wasp was crawling up somebody in front of me and I didn't know whether to ignore it or swat it but, fortunately, if flew off. And, before you ask, the music playing was not Vaughan Williams.
Michael
[This message has been edited by Michael (edited 08-13-2006).]
Comment